5 Russian Jokes About Life

Have Fun with Russian Jokes!

russian_jokes_anekdotes_humorRussian humor is different and jokes are  very diverse. We laugh at the different aspects of our life. Russian life is very humorous. Most of all we love to laugh at Russian national characteristics. Below you can read some famous  Russian anecdotes about some of the features of Russians.

Remember – it’s just a Russian jokes :)

  1. Russian Dinner

American guy tell to Russian – I can imagine how you dine: oak table, on the table – a bottle of vodka, rye bread, herring, onion, porridge, dumplings. Under the table – machine gun. On the wall – balalaika and budenovka. On the yard – the tank, and on the porch – a bear.

Russian: – What a nonsense?! Why only one bottle of vodka ?! :):):)

  1. Russian Friendship

Russian, German and a French were left on an uninhabited island. They decided to go fishing, and caught

a goldfish. So it says:

– Let me go and I will fulfill one desire to each of you.

German:

– Shot of Schnapps and go home.

He drinks Schnapps and disappears.

French:

– Glass of Champaign and go home.

He drinks Champaign and disappears.

Russian stays alone and says:

– A box of vodka and return my two friends back now :):):)

  1. Russian Woman

Americans have created a robot that replaces a man. They invited Russian, an American and a German woman.

First American went out with robot, and after some time, she asked:

– Do you think that this robot is able to replace a man in sex?

– Oh sure.

Germany’s answer is the same.

Russian woman has gone with robot. An hour, two, three – nothing happened.

Then she cried:

– Hey, where are you going? I’ll show you, “the batteries are weak!” :):):)

  1. Russian determination

Two Russian men:

– Ivan, why wheat is not growing on your field?

– Because we are not planting it!

– Why don’t you plant it?

– Because it is not growing!

  1. Russian Business

– What is the Russian business?

– To steal a box of vodka, sell it, and spend all money on drinks.

:):):)

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About Oleg Vinzhegin

Your personal guide into the world of excellent Russian speaking

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